Last night I played my new favorite night game ever! It's called Hostage and you have to have at least 10 people to play and two cars so you can split into two groups of 5. Then in those groups of 5 you split into 2 drivers, and 3 hostages. Then the hostages switch cars and get blindfolded and driven around for 20 minutes then dropped off in a random location. Then you get to call you're other teammates who drove the opposing hostages somewhere and whichever drivers find their teammates first wins.
Last night we had a huge group of people playing consisting of: My best friend Kenna, our roommates Kadi, and Madison, our friend Amber, two across the hall friends Julie and Danielle, my cast-mates Josh, Redge, and Elisa, and her friends Dory, Maribel, and Ashley. It was SO fun! I ended up getting abandoned by Madison, Amber, and Julie in the middle of nowhere! I was with Josh, Elisa, and Maribel and we seriously had no idea where we were. It was pitch black, we were on a dirt road, and couldn't see any landmarks except for a blinking tower off in the distance and what we figured were billboards on the side of what we assumed was the freeway.
When we got out of the car all we could see where fields for miles and the little dirt road we were on. We decided to start walking in the direction Madison drove away and ended up walking for about forty-five minutes before we even came to a street lamp and soon enough we found a really ghetto neighborhood. Unfortunately we still had no idea if we were in Cedar City or not (for all we knew we could've been teleported to Kansas!) So we kept walking and found a water tower. We all ran to it hoping that there would be a city name on it somewhere, but there wasn't. We got all our hopes up for nothing. By this time the other team had already won over half an hour ago. We still were determined to finish though! So we kept walking towards the billboards by the freeway.
Finally we got to a road that was parallel to the freeway. So we wandered down the road looking for an exit sign or anything to tell us where we were. Then we found exit 51 to Kanarraville. WE KNEW WHERE WE WERE! So we called our group ecstatically and they came and found us.
It was such a fun game! And we really wanted to do a round two, but unfortunately everyone in my group has auditions today so we all wanted to get a good night's rest. So we called it quits and then me and Kenna watched The Walking Dead. And then I went to sleep around 11:15.
Now it is currently the first audition day to my very exciting and full week, and I am extremely scared! I feel good about my song and my monologue but I can't help but still be nervous about the audition. Wish me luck!
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Favorite Quote
I'm not saying that everything is survivable, just that everything except the last thing is.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Saturday, October 29, 2011
AUDITIONS!!!
I have a major week coming up soon! On Monday I have an audition for Little Women, Tuesday I have an audition for Almost Maine, and then Wednesday I have my understudy performance for I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change. And then hopefully somewhere in that same week I'll have callbacks!
I'm very excited for everything that's coming up! Here's my audition pieces:
For Little Women I'm singing How Could I Know from Secret Garden
Then I am doing a monologue from The Shadow Box.
Maggie- No. I want you to come home. What is this place, anyway? They make everything so nice. Why? So you forger? I can't. I can't. I want you to come home. I want you to stay out four nights a week bowling, and then come home so I can yell and not talk to you. I want to fight so you'll take me to a movie and by the time I get you to take me I'm so upset I can't enjoy the picture. I want to get up too early, and I'll let you know about it too, because I have to make you breakfast, because you never, never once eat it, because you make me get up too early just to keep you company and talk to you, and it's cold, and my back aches, and I got nothing to say to you and we never talk, and it's six-thirty in the morning, every morning, even Sunday morning and it's all right... it's all right... it's all right because I want to be there because you need me to be there because I want you to be there because I want you to come home.
For Almost Maine I'm doing a monologue that I got in High School, but never actually performed.
Dating: I am a wonderful person; I know that sounds vain, but I am. I really truly am. I'm very likable. I hardly ever pitch a fit or raise my voice. I'm neat and clean and I read all the best-selling books and I can recite just about all of Shakespeare's sonnets. I know. I know, I'm coming on too strong here. It's our third date and I'm... I'm scaring you, I can see that. I'm sorry. I just... we all have faults, right? We all do. Maybe you beat your cat or run-over turtles on the highway or maybe it's not even a spiteful thing. And... well, so I have trouble remembering people's names, okay, it's not like I do it on purpose, it's just my thing, my one great flaw. And... I think you're a really terrific person and I like you a whole lot and I know we've been out three times now and I know you call me every night but before we go any further... I have to confess... I... I can't remember your name!
I'm also going to be auditioning for a show called Rabbit Hole on the 8th that my friend Zac Trotter is directing for Second Studio.
I need two monologues for that audition, one dramatic and one comedic.
First monologue is from 50 Guns.
Emma- I have always been fascinated by guns. Some say guns are evil. Anything created solely for the purpose of destroying other human beings must be evil. Murder is easy. It’s a terrible thing to say but murder is easy. The act itself is simple. You point the gun and pull the trigger. Easy. And guns can not undo what they have done. You can’t pull the trigger and bring somebody back. No matter how much you might want to. Once the bullet leaves—it’s never coming back.
Simon Peters was baby-sitting his 11-year-old sister, Emma, and a 12-year-old neighbor at the time of the shooting.
Simon, who recently had enlisted in the Air Force was showing his prize pistol to his little sister and the neighbor.
Simon took the magazine out of the pistol and gave the gun to his sister, unaware that a round was left in the weapon. His sister Emma pulled the trigger, hitting her older brother in the head. “It was accidental,” said local Senior Detective Andrew Macklin. “There was no foul play.”
"This is a terrible tragedy. One that his sister will have to live with..." all my life.
The second monologue is from If These Walls Could Talk.
Rose Marie- Can we talk? I am seriously worried about my future. I am worried about my personality. Everyone tells me I'm too assertive, too aggressive. They say people don't like that. They don't mean "people." They mean men. The male animal does not like a female animal who is assertive and aggressive. Tell that to the lioness in the jungle, the male lion doesn't seem to mind. I mean, what am I supposed to do? When I see something that needs to be corrected, I correct it. When I know a question has to be asked, I ask it. Why put me down for that? Am I expected to go through life with my mouth shut and my ears open? I might as well wear a veil. I tried it once- being meek and humble. Didn't work. Wasn't me. I've got problems.
I'm very excited and I hope I at least get into something out of the three!
I'm very excited for everything that's coming up! Here's my audition pieces:
For Little Women I'm singing How Could I Know from Secret Garden
Then I am doing a monologue from The Shadow Box.
Maggie- No. I want you to come home. What is this place, anyway? They make everything so nice. Why? So you forger? I can't. I can't. I want you to come home. I want you to stay out four nights a week bowling, and then come home so I can yell and not talk to you. I want to fight so you'll take me to a movie and by the time I get you to take me I'm so upset I can't enjoy the picture. I want to get up too early, and I'll let you know about it too, because I have to make you breakfast, because you never, never once eat it, because you make me get up too early just to keep you company and talk to you, and it's cold, and my back aches, and I got nothing to say to you and we never talk, and it's six-thirty in the morning, every morning, even Sunday morning and it's all right... it's all right... it's all right because I want to be there because you need me to be there because I want you to be there because I want you to come home.
For Almost Maine I'm doing a monologue that I got in High School, but never actually performed.
Dating: I am a wonderful person; I know that sounds vain, but I am. I really truly am. I'm very likable. I hardly ever pitch a fit or raise my voice. I'm neat and clean and I read all the best-selling books and I can recite just about all of Shakespeare's sonnets. I know. I know, I'm coming on too strong here. It's our third date and I'm... I'm scaring you, I can see that. I'm sorry. I just... we all have faults, right? We all do. Maybe you beat your cat or run-over turtles on the highway or maybe it's not even a spiteful thing. And... well, so I have trouble remembering people's names, okay, it's not like I do it on purpose, it's just my thing, my one great flaw. And... I think you're a really terrific person and I like you a whole lot and I know we've been out three times now and I know you call me every night but before we go any further... I have to confess... I... I can't remember your name!
I'm also going to be auditioning for a show called Rabbit Hole on the 8th that my friend Zac Trotter is directing for Second Studio.
I need two monologues for that audition, one dramatic and one comedic.
First monologue is from 50 Guns.
Emma- I have always been fascinated by guns. Some say guns are evil. Anything created solely for the purpose of destroying other human beings must be evil. Murder is easy. It’s a terrible thing to say but murder is easy. The act itself is simple. You point the gun and pull the trigger. Easy. And guns can not undo what they have done. You can’t pull the trigger and bring somebody back. No matter how much you might want to. Once the bullet leaves—it’s never coming back.
Simon Peters was baby-sitting his 11-year-old sister, Emma, and a 12-year-old neighbor at the time of the shooting.
Simon, who recently had enlisted in the Air Force was showing his prize pistol to his little sister and the neighbor.
Simon took the magazine out of the pistol and gave the gun to his sister, unaware that a round was left in the weapon. His sister Emma pulled the trigger, hitting her older brother in the head. “It was accidental,” said local Senior Detective Andrew Macklin. “There was no foul play.”
"This is a terrible tragedy. One that his sister will have to live with..." all my life.
The second monologue is from If These Walls Could Talk.
Rose Marie- Can we talk? I am seriously worried about my future. I am worried about my personality. Everyone tells me I'm too assertive, too aggressive. They say people don't like that. They don't mean "people." They mean men. The male animal does not like a female animal who is assertive and aggressive. Tell that to the lioness in the jungle, the male lion doesn't seem to mind. I mean, what am I supposed to do? When I see something that needs to be corrected, I correct it. When I know a question has to be asked, I ask it. Why put me down for that? Am I expected to go through life with my mouth shut and my ears open? I might as well wear a veil. I tried it once- being meek and humble. Didn't work. Wasn't me. I've got problems.
I'm very excited and I hope I at least get into something out of the three!
Monday, October 24, 2011
Zombie Apocalypse Guide
Just like any other red-blooded American college student I am obsessed with the concept of Zombie's. I've been watching The Walking Dead series lately and it has inspired me to write a journal on all the things I will need to know in the event of a Zombie Apocalypse.
Last year I bought a really cool looking journal/dairy from The Wiz, but so far I've never written in it. I could never think of anything worthy to write about. I mean this is one AWESOME journal. It looks very old school and the paper is old and brown and even has flower petals pressed into it.
Last year I bought a really cool looking journal/dairy from The Wiz, but so far I've never written in it. I could never think of anything worthy to write about. I mean this is one AWESOME journal. It looks very old school and the paper is old and brown and even has flower petals pressed into it.
But now I've finally found something worthy enough to be in this beautiful journal!So this is my Zombie Apocalypse Guide.
I'm going to add a bunch of things in it throughout the years till that eminent Zombie Apocalypse happens. Things like how to syphon gas, break into and hot wire a car, how to suture a cut (which I actually already know how to do thanks to Medical Anatomy in High School) and when Zombie's start taking over the world I will have a very good chance of surviving.
I already feel like I have a very good chance of surviving since I at least have common sense. Plus I know exactly where to go to get a huge variety of weapons in the event of a Zombie outbreak; Smith and Edwards! They have so many great things there! Including a Tank and other military artillery. Here is my basic list of weapon wants:
A Compound Bow with Arrows (because then I will never run out of ammo since I can go retrieve the arrows and it's silent)
Semi Automatic Shotgun (because it's easier and faster than the compound bow in case their are multiple Zombie's coming after you)
A small hatchet
Small hand scythe
A machete
A screw driver set (because they can be used as weapons as well as for their original purpose)
And I'd also need a blade sharpener for the scythe, hatchet, and machete.
There are plenty of other weapons I'd want to get as well, but these are the basics. Now I just need to start writing everything I'm going to need to know for the Apocalypse.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
I Believe:
As a member of the Mormon religion I've used these two words a lot together. At the end of last year I saw a short show called "Awesome." It was a Directing I project and a very good piece. In the middle of the show my friend Darrah had a long monologue about what she believed in. The funny thing was she mentioned things I would have never thought about. Like cell phones, and the legalization of marijuana. Now I don't believe in the later, but I can definitely say that I believe in cell phones. This monologue gave me the desire to keep a list of what I believe in. This is what I've come up with so far in no particular order:
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
The Atonement
Family
Friends
Love
Stuffed Animals
Sleeping In
Music Reading
Theatre
Singing
Long Showers
Powerful Art
Writing
Expressing Yourself
Forgiveness
Medicine
Healing Powers
Aimless Driving
Holding Hands
Kissing
Coloring
Performing
Learning
Power of the Human Touch
Meeting New People
Reuniting with Old Friends
Being Yourself
Dancing
Testing Limits
Kindness
Compassion
Cultural Differences
Feeling Beautiful
No Makeup
Power of Silence
Power of Sound
Opposites
Story Telling
Passion
Exercise
Communication
Make Believe
Meaningful Walks
Helping Others
Crying
Colors
Trying your Hardest
Doing your Best
Listening to Advice
Being Stubborn
Happiness of Sunshine
Naps
Disney Movies
Staying a Kid
Growing Up when Needed
Acceptance
Vacations
Afterlife
Cell Phones
Spike Tape
Being Friends with your Parents
Growing from Disappointment
Pushing through Trials
Being Happy
Sports
People are Generally Good
Working Together
Staying Healthy
Gum
Deodorant
Flossing
Innocence
Learning from others Mistakes
Trying New Things
Not Giving Up
Practice
Irony
Laughter
Beauty of Nature
New Technology
Sharing
Recovering from Pasts
New Beginnings
Having Choices
Hard Work
Best Friends
Appreciating the Unappreciated
Rewards
Good Parenting
Being Scared
Being a Tom-Boy
Marriage
Individuality
Playing Dress Up
Sleepovers
Junk Food
Big Dreams
Making Goals
Karma
Speech
The End.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
The Atonement
Family
Friends
Love
Stuffed Animals
Sleeping In
Music Reading
Theatre
Singing
Long Showers
Powerful Art
Writing
Expressing Yourself
Forgiveness
Medicine
Healing Powers
Aimless Driving
Holding Hands
Kissing
Coloring
Performing
Learning
Power of the Human Touch
Meeting New People
Reuniting with Old Friends
Being Yourself
Dancing
Testing Limits
Kindness
Compassion
Cultural Differences
Feeling Beautiful
No Makeup
Power of Silence
Power of Sound
Opposites
Story Telling
Passion
Exercise
Communication
Make Believe
Meaningful Walks
Helping Others
Crying
Colors
Trying your Hardest
Doing your Best
Listening to Advice
Being Stubborn
Happiness of Sunshine
Naps
Disney Movies
Staying a Kid
Growing Up when Needed
Acceptance
Vacations
Afterlife
Cell Phones
Spike Tape
Being Friends with your Parents
Growing from Disappointment
Pushing through Trials
Being Happy
Sports
People are Generally Good
Working Together
Staying Healthy
Gum
Deodorant
Flossing
Innocence
Learning from others Mistakes
Trying New Things
Not Giving Up
Practice
Irony
Laughter
Beauty of Nature
New Technology
Sharing
Recovering from Pasts
New Beginnings
Having Choices
Hard Work
Best Friends
Appreciating the Unappreciated
Rewards
Good Parenting
Being Scared
Being a Tom-Boy
Marriage
Individuality
Playing Dress Up
Sleepovers
Junk Food
Big Dreams
Making Goals
Karma
Speech
The End.
Saturday, October 15, 2011
The Walking Dead
Recently I've been converted to watching The Walking Dead, which is a TV series about a zombie apocalypse. It's actually a really good show so far and I just finished watching the first season last night. Season 2 starts tomorrow! So anyway, I love the concept of zombies. I know it would be absolutely devastating if there ever actually was a zombie apocalypse, but at the same time it would be so cool! But not really... it'd truly be horrific and dangerous and very sad. But I'd kick some zombie butt!
Anyway, this TV show made me realize something very important. I think other ethnicity's are very attractive! I should have figured that out when I started dating a half Mexican, but I guess it never really hit me. I have a thing for non-whites.
This is Steven Yuen, an actor from The Walking Dead. And he is currently my biggest celebrity crush. He is also Korean and very attractive.
This is Donald Glover. He plays Troy on Community. He is also a very attractive man, and he is definitely not white. Plus in this picture he's wearing hipster glasses! What more could I ask for?
Danny Pudi who plays Abed on Community. He is Indian, and completely adorable!
Dominic Sandoval who was on So You Think You Can Dance. Absolutely amazing breaker and very attractive Filipino!
Marko Germar also from So You Think You Can Dance. Absolutely gorgeous and from Guam!
Tadd Gadduang. So You Think You Can Dance. Filipino. Lives in Salt Lake City.
Maybe I should stop here. I definitely could go on, but I don't want my dad to have a conniption when he sees this post.
Anyway, this TV show made me realize something very important. I think other ethnicity's are very attractive! I should have figured that out when I started dating a half Mexican, but I guess it never really hit me. I have a thing for non-whites.
This is Steven Yuen, an actor from The Walking Dead. And he is currently my biggest celebrity crush. He is also Korean and very attractive.
This is Donald Glover. He plays Troy on Community. He is also a very attractive man, and he is definitely not white. Plus in this picture he's wearing hipster glasses! What more could I ask for?
Danny Pudi who plays Abed on Community. He is Indian, and completely adorable!
Dominic Sandoval who was on So You Think You Can Dance. Absolutely amazing breaker and very attractive Filipino!
Marko Germar also from So You Think You Can Dance. Absolutely gorgeous and from Guam!
Tadd Gadduang. So You Think You Can Dance. Filipino. Lives in Salt Lake City.
Maybe I should stop here. I definitely could go on, but I don't want my dad to have a conniption when he sees this post.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Fears
I've already talked about a couple of my odd fears, like morbidly obese people, and I'm not sure if I mentioned homeless people yet, but I'm also very scared of homeless people.
Today, though, I remembered a really funny fear that I have.
I'm scared of passing out in the shower.
I'm not really scared of the possibility of drowning or actually getting injured, but more of the embarrassment of needing people to come into the bathroom and help me out. I'd just be so embarrassed!
Anyways, this is a really short post. So, the end.
Today, though, I remembered a really funny fear that I have.
I'm scared of passing out in the shower.
I'm not really scared of the possibility of drowning or actually getting injured, but more of the embarrassment of needing people to come into the bathroom and help me out. I'd just be so embarrassed!
Anyways, this is a really short post. So, the end.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Aquiline Features
Today in Theatre History we were talking about Shakespeare's play As You Like It. We got on the subject of casting this show and talking about Phebe (who's supposed to be a beautiful shepherdess.) And Christine was saying how her facial features would have to contrast Rosalinds'. So she looked around the class and then said "Amanda stand up so the class can see your face." So I did.
Then Christine explained that I had aquiline features that would be good for Rosalind and her own more rounder facial features would work best to contrast mine for Phebe. She then went on to explain how my eyebrow's, nose, and mouth all looked small and delicate and stuff like that. It was flattering, but also extremely embarrassing. She was sitting there praising my face and in my head I was thinking "DON'T LOOK AT MY CLOTHES!"
Today was I was wearing my lazy/need-to-do-laundry outfit. Which consists of my orange scrubs, my brown moccasin boots, my painted Llama's with Hat's shirt, a red flannel scarf, and my hobo jacket that I found at the D.I. I also had my hair back in a braid with a ton of fly-aways sticking up (as always) so I definitely did not look very good today. But either way I still had aquiline features that Christine needed to show the class.
So I had no idea what aquiline meant, from how she explained it I just thought it meant thin and delicate or something. So I looked up the definition:
Aquiline (adj.)
1. (of the nose) shaped like an eagle's beak; hooked
2. of or resembling an eagle
That is not what I expected the definition to be. I became less flattered at this point.
I don't have a hooked nose! Do I?
I don't! I may have a large nose (it's not even that large! it's just long and not proportional to the rest of my face) but it's not hooked!
Then Christine explained that I had aquiline features that would be good for Rosalind and her own more rounder facial features would work best to contrast mine for Phebe. She then went on to explain how my eyebrow's, nose, and mouth all looked small and delicate and stuff like that. It was flattering, but also extremely embarrassing. She was sitting there praising my face and in my head I was thinking "DON'T LOOK AT MY CLOTHES!"
Today was I was wearing my lazy/need-to-do-laundry outfit. Which consists of my orange scrubs, my brown moccasin boots, my painted Llama's with Hat's shirt, a red flannel scarf, and my hobo jacket that I found at the D.I. I also had my hair back in a braid with a ton of fly-aways sticking up (as always) so I definitely did not look very good today. But either way I still had aquiline features that Christine needed to show the class.
So I had no idea what aquiline meant, from how she explained it I just thought it meant thin and delicate or something. So I looked up the definition:
Aquiline (adj.)
1. (of the nose) shaped like an eagle's beak; hooked
2. of or resembling an eagle
That is not what I expected the definition to be. I became less flattered at this point.
I don't have a hooked nose! Do I?
I don't! I may have a large nose (it's not even that large! it's just long and not proportional to the rest of my face) but it's not hooked!
Anyway, then I went and typed in aquiline features on google and clicked on pictures. And I found this picture
And it made me feel a lot better. Even though she has a long and somewhat large nose, she's still really pretty! So HA! Take that stupid aquiline nose!
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
The Tale of the Giant and the Very Small Girl
Miss Kenna has drawn to my attention that my last couple of posts have been sad. I promise this one isn't going to be sad though!
Last night I had my very first productive I Love You rehearsal! The male understudy, Alex, was actually at rehearsal for once (I don't blame him for not ever being there though, he was in King Lear) so we went into a separate room during rehearsal and walked through a bunch of scenes and practiced our music together. I think the best part of the whole night was when I had to teach Alex the dance for the Marriage Tango, and I learned how difficult it is to dance with really tall people. He is 6'5"! And how short am I? 5'3"! He is 1'2" taller than me! It's crazy!
So just try and picture this height difference. And now try and picture me dancing a tango with this guy. Difficult, right? Well it is! Not only do I have to attempt to dance with this kid, but I also have to kiss him at some point. Not really sure how that one is going to work out.
I find this height difference extremely amusing since it makes all our scenes even more awkward and funny! We're rehearsing again today at 2 since he has work and can't come to our regular rehearsal, so it's going to be another fun day of attempting to do scenes with a giant.
Last night I had my very first productive I Love You rehearsal! The male understudy, Alex, was actually at rehearsal for once (I don't blame him for not ever being there though, he was in King Lear) so we went into a separate room during rehearsal and walked through a bunch of scenes and practiced our music together. I think the best part of the whole night was when I had to teach Alex the dance for the Marriage Tango, and I learned how difficult it is to dance with really tall people. He is 6'5"! And how short am I? 5'3"! He is 1'2" taller than me! It's crazy!
So just try and picture this height difference. And now try and picture me dancing a tango with this guy. Difficult, right? Well it is! Not only do I have to attempt to dance with this kid, but I also have to kiss him at some point. Not really sure how that one is going to work out.
I find this height difference extremely amusing since it makes all our scenes even more awkward and funny! We're rehearsing again today at 2 since he has work and can't come to our regular rehearsal, so it's going to be another fun day of attempting to do scenes with a giant.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Off Day
Today I feel very off balance. It's been so bad that this morning during my Aural Skills test I started crying. I had already done the written portion of the test and I walked in to do the sight singing portion and messed up once and just started crying. It was extremely embarrassing! I blamed it on my lack of sleep and frustration at not doing as well as I wanted to on that test. But then my emotions got the better of me again during Jazz. We were doing pirouette's and my legs just weren't working right and I couldn't even do a single turn. I got so mad at myself that I just started crying, again. I've decided that my tear ducts are not only connected to my sad emotions, but also my frustration, anger, and even extremely happy emotions. It can cause very embarrassing moments for myself.
So anyway I'm not entirely sure why I'm having such an off day. But I am... I guess there are plenty of possible reasons:
I haven't been getting enough sleep.
I have rehearsals for I Love You every night and I am supposed to be memorized by now but I'm struggling with getting every character's line's down.
I have to write two papers this week, one due on Thursday, the other on Friday.
I have a ton of regular homework that I need to do even without having to write those two papers.
I haven't been having any fun lately because all I do is homework and rehearsal, so basically I miss my friends.
And I'm homesick.
So hopefully things will get better over the weekend. I'll just have to tough it out till then though! I can do it!
So anyway I'm not entirely sure why I'm having such an off day. But I am... I guess there are plenty of possible reasons:
I haven't been getting enough sleep.
I have rehearsals for I Love You every night and I am supposed to be memorized by now but I'm struggling with getting every character's line's down.
I have to write two papers this week, one due on Thursday, the other on Friday.
I have a ton of regular homework that I need to do even without having to write those two papers.
I haven't been having any fun lately because all I do is homework and rehearsal, so basically I miss my friends.
And I'm homesick.
So hopefully things will get better over the weekend. I'll just have to tough it out till then though! I can do it!
Monday, October 10, 2011
Mumford and Sons
And now my heart stumbles on things I don't know,
My weakness, I feel, I must finally show...
"Awake My Soul" Mumford and Sons.
This is such an amazing song! But I'm momentarily going to take these two lines out of context of the rest of the song and talk about myself.
Last night I had a very interesting conversation with Gratten about religion. Very fitting since it was Sunday. Obviously, being me, while telling him what I believe in I started crying. It wasn't bad at first though, I just got teary eyed. Then as the conversation went on I somehow started talking about families, specifically how I believe that families can be together forever when they are sealed in the temple. That's when I lost it! There was a constant waterfall of tears as I basically bore my testimony to my Christian boyfriend about how I believe that when we die I will be able to be with my family in the afterlife.
After I was done I actually looked over at him and saw that he was crying as well. That certainly threw me for a loop. I didn't hear him crying over my shuddering gasps and machine gun sobs between each word. I had no idea what to do when I saw him crying... I had never seen him cry before. I've seen him get teary eyed once before when he was telling me about how his dad cried after watching him graduate from High School, but this was in a completely different ball park. I didn't know what to say or do, so I just sat there looking bewildered while still sobbing. Then he said these words, "I can't give you what you want."
Okay, that is totally NOT what I was expecting him to say. I'm not even sure what I was expecting him to say but it definitely wasn't that. I didn't know what to say, at the time I wasn't even sure what he was referring to. Finally I got control of my voice and asked what he meant, but he couldn't answer me because he was still sobbing. I was shocked, confused, and worried so I just rubbed his back and held his head as he cried on. I don't think I realized how much I cared about him till this moment. I knew I liked him a lot, but watching him cry like that just hurt!
Eventually he was able to talk and he told me how much he was scared for our future. He told me that he was starting to invest a lot into our relationship and he didn't want to get hurt and left just because he wasn't Mormon. So what do I do? I close off to my emotions and ask him if I should just leave. Which made him cry harder. So then being my pushy self I asked him again and told him he needed to be completely honest with me. He still couldn't answer through his tears. So I waited, and eventually he said one word, "Yes."
I was crushed! I grabbed my keys and walked out sobbing. I got into my car and drove back to Eccles. Luckily I was able to control myself on the way home and I had stopped crying by the time I walked into my room so no one could tell that anything was wrong.
After a couple minutes I just became angry. So I left and walked aimlessly around my building trying to decide what to do. I came up with two possibilities. Call my mother and ask for her advice, which I'm sure would have been very helpful and made me feel a lot better. But I was so angry that I chose to go with my second possibility which was to call Gratten and give him a piece of my mind! I think I did this because I knew if I had called my mom she would have calmed me down and I wouldn't have been able to say all the mean things I wanted to say. I was hurt and wanted vindication.
So I called him, and he answered, and I couldn't say anything that I wanted to. I guess I just really like this kid a lot and I couldn't bear to say any of the hurtful things I had planned on saying because he's such a nice guy and he would NEVER do anything like that to me. So instead I just pathetically said "I'm sorry." And then he said, "I'm sorry too." And we both started crying again. So then I just told him I was coming back over and he said okay.
When I got back things somehow magically fixed themselves. We talked about how we'd just figure things out as they happened and then joked about how pathetic each other looks when we cry. He then said, "I'm willing to try everything I can to make things work."
So we're good now, and I'm happy. But deep down inside I feel guilty. I don't know why, but I do. We haven't talked about anything as serious as marriage or anything, but after that whole ordeal I can't help but think about it. Don' worry though, I know I'm not anywhere near close to making a major life decision like that! I don't want to worry about getting married for a long time! But I know that I wouldn't be opposed to marrying him. He's very nice, mature, and such a gentleman. Plus he's attractive, funny, and very enjoyable to be around. And Christian...
And now my heart stumbles on things I don't know...
My weakness, I feel, I must finally show...
"Awake My Soul" Mumford and Sons.
This is such an amazing song! But I'm momentarily going to take these two lines out of context of the rest of the song and talk about myself.
Last night I had a very interesting conversation with Gratten about religion. Very fitting since it was Sunday. Obviously, being me, while telling him what I believe in I started crying. It wasn't bad at first though, I just got teary eyed. Then as the conversation went on I somehow started talking about families, specifically how I believe that families can be together forever when they are sealed in the temple. That's when I lost it! There was a constant waterfall of tears as I basically bore my testimony to my Christian boyfriend about how I believe that when we die I will be able to be with my family in the afterlife.
After I was done I actually looked over at him and saw that he was crying as well. That certainly threw me for a loop. I didn't hear him crying over my shuddering gasps and machine gun sobs between each word. I had no idea what to do when I saw him crying... I had never seen him cry before. I've seen him get teary eyed once before when he was telling me about how his dad cried after watching him graduate from High School, but this was in a completely different ball park. I didn't know what to say or do, so I just sat there looking bewildered while still sobbing. Then he said these words, "I can't give you what you want."
Okay, that is totally NOT what I was expecting him to say. I'm not even sure what I was expecting him to say but it definitely wasn't that. I didn't know what to say, at the time I wasn't even sure what he was referring to. Finally I got control of my voice and asked what he meant, but he couldn't answer me because he was still sobbing. I was shocked, confused, and worried so I just rubbed his back and held his head as he cried on. I don't think I realized how much I cared about him till this moment. I knew I liked him a lot, but watching him cry like that just hurt!
Eventually he was able to talk and he told me how much he was scared for our future. He told me that he was starting to invest a lot into our relationship and he didn't want to get hurt and left just because he wasn't Mormon. So what do I do? I close off to my emotions and ask him if I should just leave. Which made him cry harder. So then being my pushy self I asked him again and told him he needed to be completely honest with me. He still couldn't answer through his tears. So I waited, and eventually he said one word, "Yes."
I was crushed! I grabbed my keys and walked out sobbing. I got into my car and drove back to Eccles. Luckily I was able to control myself on the way home and I had stopped crying by the time I walked into my room so no one could tell that anything was wrong.
After a couple minutes I just became angry. So I left and walked aimlessly around my building trying to decide what to do. I came up with two possibilities. Call my mother and ask for her advice, which I'm sure would have been very helpful and made me feel a lot better. But I was so angry that I chose to go with my second possibility which was to call Gratten and give him a piece of my mind! I think I did this because I knew if I had called my mom she would have calmed me down and I wouldn't have been able to say all the mean things I wanted to say. I was hurt and wanted vindication.
So I called him, and he answered, and I couldn't say anything that I wanted to. I guess I just really like this kid a lot and I couldn't bear to say any of the hurtful things I had planned on saying because he's such a nice guy and he would NEVER do anything like that to me. So instead I just pathetically said "I'm sorry." And then he said, "I'm sorry too." And we both started crying again. So then I just told him I was coming back over and he said okay.
When I got back things somehow magically fixed themselves. We talked about how we'd just figure things out as they happened and then joked about how pathetic each other looks when we cry. He then said, "I'm willing to try everything I can to make things work."
So we're good now, and I'm happy. But deep down inside I feel guilty. I don't know why, but I do. We haven't talked about anything as serious as marriage or anything, but after that whole ordeal I can't help but think about it. Don' worry though, I know I'm not anywhere near close to making a major life decision like that! I don't want to worry about getting married for a long time! But I know that I wouldn't be opposed to marrying him. He's very nice, mature, and such a gentleman. Plus he's attractive, funny, and very enjoyable to be around. And Christian...
And now my heart stumbles on things I don't know...
Friday, October 7, 2011
High School Shakespeare Competition
So just as an update from the last two posts, the Derby Darling Pageant has been canceled due to some inter-Greek issues. Apparently the Alpha Phi's were hazing the Sigma Chi pledges, and all the Greeks here have a very strict "no hazing" policy. So at the moment all the Greek organizations are being questioned and to my immense disappointment the Alpha Phi's are trying to put all the blame on the Sigma Chi's and being the gentleman that they are, they're just letting it happen. So at the moment the Sigma Chi's have been put on suspension by the school just till they figure out this whole mess.
So on to not much happy things, this weekend is the High School Shakespeare Competition. Which means that my campus has been taken over by very excited kids from over 100 High Schools. It's crazy here! And to my dismay because I am a Theatre Major I have to put in 3 hours of work for the competition. I've already done my 3 hours today. I timed the Ten Minute Group Scenes from noon to three, but tonight I have to go back at 5:25 to be a runner. Apparently since I've been so reliable in the past they keep asking me if I'll help out with other things even though I've put in my hours already. When a girl didn't show up at 4 Kelly called me and asked if I could go time for her, I went but the girl was there she just didn't know she was supposed to check in. Then I came back to my apartment but I got a text from Kelly asking if I would come back. So I started heading back when I got another phone call from Kelly saying that the person showed up so I didn't need to come anymore, but that they would need help at 5:30.
So as you can probably tell my day has been crazy busy! And I don't think it's going to get any better!
So on to not much happy things, this weekend is the High School Shakespeare Competition. Which means that my campus has been taken over by very excited kids from over 100 High Schools. It's crazy here! And to my dismay because I am a Theatre Major I have to put in 3 hours of work for the competition. I've already done my 3 hours today. I timed the Ten Minute Group Scenes from noon to three, but tonight I have to go back at 5:25 to be a runner. Apparently since I've been so reliable in the past they keep asking me if I'll help out with other things even though I've put in my hours already. When a girl didn't show up at 4 Kelly called me and asked if I could go time for her, I went but the girl was there she just didn't know she was supposed to check in. Then I came back to my apartment but I got a text from Kelly asking if I would come back. So I started heading back when I got another phone call from Kelly saying that the person showed up so I didn't need to come anymore, but that they would need help at 5:30.
So as you can probably tell my day has been crazy busy! And I don't think it's going to get any better!
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Me In A Pageant?!?!
Remember the Derby Darling Pageant I was talking about earlier? Well I am now in that said Pageant.
Luckily this isn't a real pageant, or else I would be freaking out right now wondering why me out of all people were chosen to do this. This pageant is a mock pageant. And the people involved are going to perform three different categories: 1) dress as your hero (realistic or fictional), 2) talent, this can be anything you fancy, and 3) Dress-wear/interview/questions.
The thing I am most concerned for is the interview. Not because I'll have to do an interview, but because I don't have any fancy dress to wear. I left all my nice dresses at home because I didn't think I'd have any need for them. I guess I was wrong about that.
I'm honestly not even sure what I'm going to do for any of these categories. This whole pageant is supposed to be funny, so I don't even know what to do for a talent. I thought about singing, but most of the songs I know are very serious. I'm still trying to figure out a hero I should dress up as too.
So, basically, I have no idea what I'm doing. And this pageant is on Friday... Yikes.
Luckily this isn't a real pageant, or else I would be freaking out right now wondering why me out of all people were chosen to do this. This pageant is a mock pageant. And the people involved are going to perform three different categories: 1) dress as your hero (realistic or fictional), 2) talent, this can be anything you fancy, and 3) Dress-wear/interview/questions.
The thing I am most concerned for is the interview. Not because I'll have to do an interview, but because I don't have any fancy dress to wear. I left all my nice dresses at home because I didn't think I'd have any need for them. I guess I was wrong about that.
I'm honestly not even sure what I'm going to do for any of these categories. This whole pageant is supposed to be funny, so I don't even know what to do for a talent. I thought about singing, but most of the songs I know are very serious. I'm still trying to figure out a hero I should dress up as too.
So, basically, I have no idea what I'm doing. And this pageant is on Friday... Yikes.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Derby Darling Pageant
Once upon a time there was something called a Derby Darling Pageant. To tell you the truth I have no idea what it is exactly, all I know is that the Sigma Chi's are in charge of it and this year they've gotten Rachel to be in it. She wants to sing a song called Coolest Girl from A Very Potter Sequel, so naturally she asked if I would be the wonderful friend I am and learn how to play the song on the piano. And being the pushover I am even though I am extremely busy, I agreed to help out.
Luckily I already knew how to play half of the song on the piano already because it was one of the songs I tried learning over the summer. It's actually a really funny song! And here is the story behind it:
There once was a boy named Darren Chris
Those of you who watch Glee will recognize him from that show. I don't watch Glee, and honestly I wish he would quit Glee and go back to what he was doing before he got on that TV show.
What he did before Glee was practically the most amazing thing any thespian, Harry Potter nerd could ever dream of. He co-founded an acting company called Team Starkid, and helped write A Very Potter Musical, which is a musical spoof on Harry Potter. After it became a huge hit Team Starkid wrote A Very Potter Sequel. Which is where this song Coolest Girl (sung by Hermione Granger) can be found. Both of these musicals are a huge success and can be found on youtube. Team Starkid has been thinking about writing another Harry Potter related musical, but unfortunately Darren (who played Harry in both shows) is in Glee and doesn't have the time. So that is why I wish he would quit Glee, because I don't enjoy Glee, but I love Harry Potter!
Anyway, back to Rachel and her talent. I am going to be playing the piano for her in this pageant... that is, if we can master it by Friday. So hopefully all goes well, and this doesn't cause me any stress.
Luckily I already knew how to play half of the song on the piano already because it was one of the songs I tried learning over the summer. It's actually a really funny song! And here is the story behind it:
There once was a boy named Darren Chris
Those of you who watch Glee will recognize him from that show. I don't watch Glee, and honestly I wish he would quit Glee and go back to what he was doing before he got on that TV show.
What he did before Glee was practically the most amazing thing any thespian, Harry Potter nerd could ever dream of. He co-founded an acting company called Team Starkid, and helped write A Very Potter Musical, which is a musical spoof on Harry Potter. After it became a huge hit Team Starkid wrote A Very Potter Sequel. Which is where this song Coolest Girl (sung by Hermione Granger) can be found. Both of these musicals are a huge success and can be found on youtube. Team Starkid has been thinking about writing another Harry Potter related musical, but unfortunately Darren (who played Harry in both shows) is in Glee and doesn't have the time. So that is why I wish he would quit Glee, because I don't enjoy Glee, but I love Harry Potter!
Anyway, back to Rachel and her talent. I am going to be playing the piano for her in this pageant... that is, if we can master it by Friday. So hopefully all goes well, and this doesn't cause me any stress.
Monday, October 3, 2011
The Third Witch
I just finished reading a book for my Writing About Shakespeare English class. It's called The Third Witch by Rebecca Reisert.
It was such a good book! I didn't expect to like it, since I hardly ever like the books I'm forced to read for classes, but this slowly became one of my new favorite books. The book is a adaptation on Shakespeare's Macbeth. It's about a girl named Gilly, who has a dark past with Lord Macbeth, whom she only refers to as Him in her mind.
Gilly goes through a lot in this book as it follows her on a path of revenge. On this path she experiences everything from disguising herself as a boy to climbing through a latrine shaft. She is a very powerful character with powerful motives that get her, as well as the people who are close to her, into a lot of trouble. She goes through emotions from pure hatred and fear all the way to heart ache and sorrow.
I loved watching the parallels that were drawn to Macbeth and the cool twist that the writer made on the witches. Throughout the book I could always tell that Macbeth had done something terrible to Gilly's family, I figured he had murdered her parents. The truth, however, was not expected which made me love the book even more. All the twist and parallels that were drawn between this book and Shakespeare's Macbeth is what made it a very good read. I loved it and highly recommend it to anyone who has read, seen, or at least understands the plot line of Macbeth.
It was such a good book! I didn't expect to like it, since I hardly ever like the books I'm forced to read for classes, but this slowly became one of my new favorite books. The book is a adaptation on Shakespeare's Macbeth. It's about a girl named Gilly, who has a dark past with Lord Macbeth, whom she only refers to as Him in her mind.
Gilly goes through a lot in this book as it follows her on a path of revenge. On this path she experiences everything from disguising herself as a boy to climbing through a latrine shaft. She is a very powerful character with powerful motives that get her, as well as the people who are close to her, into a lot of trouble. She goes through emotions from pure hatred and fear all the way to heart ache and sorrow.
I loved watching the parallels that were drawn to Macbeth and the cool twist that the writer made on the witches. Throughout the book I could always tell that Macbeth had done something terrible to Gilly's family, I figured he had murdered her parents. The truth, however, was not expected which made me love the book even more. All the twist and parallels that were drawn between this book and Shakespeare's Macbeth is what made it a very good read. I loved it and highly recommend it to anyone who has read, seen, or at least understands the plot line of Macbeth.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Conference Weekend
I love General Conference, especially because now I get to see my mom on television singing in the choir. But I love Conference even more this weekend because I get to see my mom not only on TV but in person! I'M FINALLY HOME!
I've missed being home so much the past few weeks at college. Even though I love school, and all my classes, and being with friends I still get really homesick sometimes. I'm so happy that Anthony let me skip this weekends rehearsals to come home and be with my family again!
At the present moment I am waiting for the Saturday afternoon session to start, so I decided I would blog about how awesome it is being home. I've really missed waking up to my dad's voice. It's a ton better than my phone alarm! I've also just missed sitting around and talking with my mom, or watching TV with her. Last night I got to do both and it just made me so happy!
I think the most amazing thing that's happened so far is that Taylor willingly hugged me last night! I think he really does miss me when I'm gone even if he won't admit to it. I'm sure he doesn't miss the bathroom sharing or TV sharing though.
Tomorrow is Sarah's birthday and I'm so happy I get to be home for it! She's turning fifteen! It's terrifying how old she's getting! It's funny to me that as I watch Anna grow up it's completely different from watching Sarah grow up. Every year Anna grows and matures and it seems very natural to me, but Sarah is another matter. Yes, she grows and matures just like her sister (and when I say grow I don't mean physically because she's definitely not doing that, I mean mentally) but she stays pretty much the same sweet, innocent little girl that I always want her to be. And I'm positive she's always going to stay that sweet, innocent little girl! Anna goes through changes with her friends and interests, but Sarah will never stop loving Pokemon or Corduroy, and I think that's why it's weird for me every time she gets a year older. I've just decided that when we're all older she's going to live with me whether she wants to or not, because I'm never going to be willing to let go of my fiery headed little sister!
Today we are going to watch Dolphin Tale for her birthday celebration. It looks like a very cute movie, so I hope I like it. Dad and Taylor are going to the Priesthood session of Conference tonight so it's going to be an all girl thing. I'm very excited! I love my family so much, and ironically I am listen to the children's choir singing in Conference right now and they are singing "Families Can Be Together Forever." I know that is true, and I'm so grateful for that because I wouldn't be able to live happily without the wonderful family that I have!
I've missed being home so much the past few weeks at college. Even though I love school, and all my classes, and being with friends I still get really homesick sometimes. I'm so happy that Anthony let me skip this weekends rehearsals to come home and be with my family again!
At the present moment I am waiting for the Saturday afternoon session to start, so I decided I would blog about how awesome it is being home. I've really missed waking up to my dad's voice. It's a ton better than my phone alarm! I've also just missed sitting around and talking with my mom, or watching TV with her. Last night I got to do both and it just made me so happy!
I think the most amazing thing that's happened so far is that Taylor willingly hugged me last night! I think he really does miss me when I'm gone even if he won't admit to it. I'm sure he doesn't miss the bathroom sharing or TV sharing though.
Tomorrow is Sarah's birthday and I'm so happy I get to be home for it! She's turning fifteen! It's terrifying how old she's getting! It's funny to me that as I watch Anna grow up it's completely different from watching Sarah grow up. Every year Anna grows and matures and it seems very natural to me, but Sarah is another matter. Yes, she grows and matures just like her sister (and when I say grow I don't mean physically because she's definitely not doing that, I mean mentally) but she stays pretty much the same sweet, innocent little girl that I always want her to be. And I'm positive she's always going to stay that sweet, innocent little girl! Anna goes through changes with her friends and interests, but Sarah will never stop loving Pokemon or Corduroy, and I think that's why it's weird for me every time she gets a year older. I've just decided that when we're all older she's going to live with me whether she wants to or not, because I'm never going to be willing to let go of my fiery headed little sister!
Today we are going to watch Dolphin Tale for her birthday celebration. It looks like a very cute movie, so I hope I like it. Dad and Taylor are going to the Priesthood session of Conference tonight so it's going to be an all girl thing. I'm very excited! I love my family so much, and ironically I am listen to the children's choir singing in Conference right now and they are singing "Families Can Be Together Forever." I know that is true, and I'm so grateful for that because I wouldn't be able to live happily without the wonderful family that I have!
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