Guilty Pleasures

I've recently realized that my guilty pleasures are very unusual for a person of my age of the female population.  The norm, obviously, being chocolate, bacon, shopping, Dr.Pepper (or whatever soda you're addicted to), Jersey Shore (or whatever other ridiculous television show makes you feel better about your own life), trashy celebrity gossip magazines, shoe shopping (because apparently it's a completely different endeavor than regular shopping which is listed above) et cetera et cetera.  So clearly there must be something wrong with my girl capabilities because none of these fall into my guilty pleasure list.  I mean I must admit that I love chocolate, bacon, and Dr. Pepper as much as anyone else, but they aren't guilty pleasures, they are just pure and simple pleasures for me!

So here is my guilty pleasure list:

#1: Homestar Runner!  Shocking I know, but seriously it's probably the most fantastic website I've ever been on.  It has the capability to keep me entertained and laughing for hours!  Especially Teen Girl Squad and Strong Bad Emails and I mean come on who doesn't love Trogdor?!

#2: Really ugly sweaters.  I love wearing baggy, frumpy, horrendous looking sweaters in the winter.  Anyone who knew me at school last year can vouch for this because that's pretty much all I ever wore.

#3: My hobo boots.  I have a pair of snow boots that I found at the D.I. last year that I have completely fallen in love with.  I wear them whenever I get the chance.  They are so big and clumpy looking that I just look so funny when I wear them, but they are also the greatest things that have ever graced my feet.  I even wear them during the summer.  It's a serious problem.

#4: Working my body so hard that I feel physically ill.  Lately I've been going to the gym a lot and I've been doing a lot of weight training.  Sometimes I enjoy working so hard without breaks that I feel like I'm going to vomit.  It just gives me this overwhelming feeling of achievement. 

#5: My superhero fantasies.  Sometimes when I am in a frustrating situation I imagine that I have superpowers and I can do anything I want.  Like vaporize the incredibly annoying person talking to me, or mind control the absolutely beautiful girl talking to the guy I like into saying something completely embarrassing and irrevocable, or even hulking it up and beating everyone that crosses me into a pulp.

#6: My future wedding plans.  Yes some of you will try to argue that this is something that all girls obsess over, but first let me explain before you start putting me into the "normal girl" category.  I sometimes like to imagine my wedding themes in the not so normal way.  Like a Marvel themed wedding (me and my husband would be dressed as Marvel characters and all the decor would be superhero themed and we would get an emergency call at the end of the reception to go fight crime in whatever place we were honey mooning and we'd rush off in our tricked out super car to go save the day), or an Avatar wedding (as in Avatar the last airbender not the blue space people), and obviously a HP wedding (because seriously Harry Potter is the greatest thing on planet earth.)

#7: Being cooler than everyone else.  No explanation needed.

Reason Behind the Love

This blog post is for my dear friend Mads who was wondering why I love the story of Peter Pan so much.  So here goes:

I don't want to grow up.  I never have, and I never will.  That's why I still play pretend whenever I can.  This is also why I love theatre so much!  It's just playing pretend in front of an audience and you have a chance to entertain and make people happy (or give them something to really think about depending on what kind of show it is.)

I have a small fear that involves growing up: I'm scared that I will lose my understanding and love of childhood innocence.  So a land where you never have to grow up appeals to me.  Neverland sounds like the most magical place in the world!  I want to spend all of my life in a wonderful world of mystery and play where I never have to worry about growing up.

So basically that's the gist of why I love Peter Pan so much.  Plus it contains some of the best lines in the entire universe!  My absolute favorite version is the 2003 version of Peter Pan with Jeremy Sumpter as Peter (he's so adorable!)

(P.S. I don't own this movie *hint hint* to anyone interested in making me the happiest person in the entire universe.  And no Maddie I am not talking to you so don't you dare even think about it!  You already bought me the best birthday present anyone could ever ask for!)

Anyway onto my favorite quotes from this movie:

"Forget them, Wendy.  Forget them all.  Come with me where you'll never, never have to worry about grown up things again!"

"I want always to be a boy, and have fun."

"Then go home.  Go home and grow up.  And take your feelings with you!"

"You offend reason, sir.  I should like to offend it with you."

"One girl's worth more than 20 boys."

"To live would be an awfully big adventure."

"Have you not noticed?  Observe her mouth.  There, hidden in the right hand corner."  "Is that a kiss?"  "A hidden kiss."  "But what is it for?"  "It is for the greatest adventure of all.  They that find it have slipped in and out of heaven."  "Find what?"  "The one the kiss belongs to." 

End of quotes.

So there it is.  My reasons for loving Peter Pan so much.  So basically I've just come to the realization that I refuse to grow up.  And someday I will find a man who also refuses to grow up and then we can not grow up together!  

The end.

Fun Facts

Today I decided to make a list of me related facts.


Fact number one: I have two fake teeth

This is a picture of the screw that is in my jaw that one of the fake teeth is planted on.


Fact numero two: my favorite theatre character that I have ever done was actually not even an actual part.  It was just a costume that I got to randomly pick out during a Musical Revue for the song "Show People."  I was pregnant, had a baby taped to my chest, and was smoking.  

And the mother of the year award goes to (drum roll) ME!


Fact number three: My longest relationship was with my very first boyfriend Garrett.  It lasted two and a half years and ended very badly for both of us.  But we've grown up since then and now we're on good terms with each other.  Hooray for maturing!

This would be Mr. Stud Muffin working on his mothers car.


Fact four: Once upon a time I spooned with Zefron.

He was a cardboard cutout of Troy Bolton from High School Musical, and I was a lonely college girl, one thing led to another and here we are.


Fact six minus one: I own a dirt bike.

And I can actually ride it too!  I also enjoy rock climbing, long boarding, and skiing in case there are any men out there looking for a girl who is single and fun. 

Side-note: I think I might mention the fact that

I'm single on this blog way too much.  I mean come

on girl, desperate much? *uncomfortable chuckle*

. . . yeah, maybe a little bit. . .

Fact actual six: I own a pair of footy pajama's.

The only problem is they have two left feet... which probably explains why there were at the D.I. in the first place.


Fact number seven: I used to have long hair, as you can all see from the previous pictures, but now I have short hair.

This is actually the very first picture I ever took with my short hair.  Pretty right?  Also that's one of my best friends McKenna.  She's eating raw cookie dough because we do that sometimes.

This is my even shorter hair and my other best friend Maddie, along with McKenna again.

Side-note #2: if you ever see the three of us looking at

you like this you are probably going to die really soon.

Fact # (number sign) 8 (eight): I am a kid at heart and I enjoy doing very childish things.

Including, but not limited to: making my own cardboard armor and wearing it in public, building blanket forts, playing lava tag, wearing tin foil fats around campus to ward away aliens, fighting with lightsabers or Nerf swords (and winning said fights), refusing to wear shoes outside, finger painting, tree climbing, fence climbing, school climbing (which is where you climb on top of an elementary school in Cedar City because you can), coloring, stalking people around campus and pretending they can't see you when you know they can, spontaneously busting into ninja moves to destroy the bad guys (or just the stupid fruit fly buzzing around), accepting double dog dares, eating candy for dinner, pretending to be a zombie, and going on quests to find Narnia (which was eventually found in the bush below.)

FACT NEIN! *ahem* I mean nine: I have a secret desire to be a model.

But alas, I am too short; and anyway models are snotty jerks who think they're better than everyone else so whatever!

Fact # 10:  I once dated a frat guy!

"What's with the sombrero picture?" you may ask.  Well the frat guy I dated was Mexican so I felt like it was fitting.  Okay, fine, he was only half Mexican, and even then he was pretty much as white as they come (I mean personality wise.)

And here he is now, the man of the hour with me slung over his shoulder.  Hello Gratten!  How's it been going since you preemptively dumped me?  No, don't worry, I'm completely over it!

Side-note #3: I really am over it.  And Gratten if you are

reading this, which is a possibility since I do post these on

facebook, I just want you to know that I think you are a

wonderful person and I miss your long face!

Fact eleven: I love snakes!  So much that sometimes I just let them slither all over me during "Th Big Bang Theory" marathons.

I want a pet snake really bad, but unfortunately my parents STRONGLY disapprove of them.

Fact eleven point two: I love haunted houses!

Especially the ones where you can pay extra to wear a glow stick necklace that allows the actors to actually touch you and drag you around the rooms.

Fact 11.8: I thoroughly enjoy shooting guns.

And I'm actually quite decent at hitting clay pigeons.

Fact number twelve: Fall is my favorite season.

Reasons: It's not freezing cold but it's chilly enough that I can wear my chunky ugly sweaters.  It's not blazing hot like in the summer where you can't even will yourself to step outside of your air conditioned house.  Also it's just absolutely beautiful!

13: I have an inner cowgirl that desperately wants to exist on the outside too.

It's causing me to question my parents choice to live in good ol' K-town instead of Winnemucca, Nevada.

Fact numero fourteen: I'm tired so I'm going to end this post here so I can go dream of wonderful things.

Very last side-note: the wonderful things I am about 

to dream of probably involve a giant apple pie, a Pikachu,

Link, a french llama, an ostrich, and possibly a cute boy.

I mean definitely a cute boy because I already said Link

was going to be there, but also possibly another cute boy.

The end.

A Poem for You

There is a talent that you possess

That most tongues lack; consider yourself blessed.

You seduce with words, proof of a brilliant mind,

And a boy with a brain is hard to find.

With every word that your soft lips utter

My heart begins to frantically flutter.

Your alluring alliteration causes me to forget to breathe;

Many memories with you I'd like to weave.

I seep with excitement for that awaited date

To finally see if I will be a part of your fate.

For my dear Peter Pan you truly are,

But am I really your Wendy, will we fly past that star?


I pray that we do for the plans I have in mind
Are meant to be shared with you: my one of a kind.
A dance across the blackened street;
A secret place where we could meet.
A blanket fort spread across the room;
Avoiding the ground to escape lava induced doom.
A Disney marathon, and a trip to the zoo,
All these things I desire to do with you.


So you see, my dearest Peter,
I believe that nothing could be sweeter
Than getting to know you more
And allowing my heart to soar.
Your Wendy waits humbly for the time drawing nigh
that you will finally teach her to fight and to fly.
Then maybe someday we'll fly through the night
far and beyond that second star to the right.

This is a Blog Post

This is a word:

Cantankerous

This is a line:

______________________________________________________________

This is a pokemon:

This is a book that everyone should read:

This is some advice:

Use your words!

This is a list that will only make sense to me:

Golf Cart

Lunchables

Birthmark

Theo

Simba

Captain America

Peter Pan

Nutella

Cowboy

Spiderman

Cameras

Kenneth

Coloring

Santa

This is a confession:

I am a hardcore nerdfighter!

This is my favorite fruit:

This is my current song:

This is a picture that describes my addiction to pie:

This is a color that I love:
ORANGE!


This is something I really want to say to someone:
"If you upset her one more time I am going to make this upcoming school year a world of pain for you!"


This is something else I want to say to a day, not a person:
"Please get here sooner!"


This is a thought:
I thoroughly enjoy school and am scared for the day that it's officially over.


And this is a poem that someone wrote for me:

Amanda

What children know and wise men teach,

You have already in your reach.

Free of fear, you are no more

Than what you've hoped ans waited for:

Yourself! So singular and true.

You see Amanda, you are YOU.

While others strive to emulate,

You simply live and emanate.

So dance and sing, and laugh aloud

For all that's yours you should be proud.

The beauty in that purest face

And tongue that's quick and full of grace.

A willingness to play and smile,

Yet not afraid to toil a while.

The gentlest gift that you possess

Is how you often treat the rest.

One by one, others you accept

To pardon and love you are adept.

So thank you, 'Wendy', for you see

My happy thought is: YOU like ME.

And this is the end.

Hello during a random desert, the month and day of which coincide numerically with your expulsion from a uterus

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ME!


In lieu of my birth I am going to tell you the true story of my life.  Now many of you may choose not to believe this, but I promise you on all of the cheese and crackers in the entire universe that every word I will type from here on out is completely and 100% true.


On July 1st of 1992 I was born.  As soon as the doctor laid eyes on me he knew what I would become, "This one is destined for greatness!" he told my mother as he laid me in her arms.  And ever since that day no 6 words were ever truer!


From birth until the age of 9 my parents tried to help me live a normal life.  They tried to ignore the signs, to ignore the powers I possessed, and even to ignore all the calls they were receiving from the government about me.  I must admit that I was rooting for them too!  My not entirely developed mind was scared of what I was destined for.  I wanted this burden to be passed along to another kid, someone who would be up to the challenge, for I feared that I was not.  By the age of 10 we couldn't ignore the signs any longer.  I was already becoming very powerful.  I  had already learned how to fight: I was very skilled in the art of sword fighting, archery, knife throwing, hand to hand combat, and I was also very good with a .22 pistol.


It was November 21st, 2002, that it finally happened.  I was just leaving school as I noticed a man around the age of 27 walking towards me.  At first he seemed like any other dad that was searching for his kids to drive them home, but suddenly I just knew.  He was there to kill me.  I began sprinting towards him, it was as if I had no control over my own body.  I wasn't thinking of what I was doing, I just knew that it had to be done.  As I got near him he pulled out a gun and pointed it to me.  I leaped into the air and soared over his head.  Along the way I managed to grab the gun and twist it out of his grip.  As I somersaulted over the man I twisted my body so I landed facing his back.  He turned around in shock to find me pointing the gun at his chest.  Right before I was about to pull the trigger my brain finally caught up to my body.  I stopped myself just before killing him.
"Why are you here?" I asked him very calmly.
Instead of responding he simply smiled a very knowing smile.
"Why are you here?" I persisted, beginning to lose my patience.
When he refused to speak again I turned the gun, pointed it at his right foot, and pulled the trigger.  He crumpled to the ground in pain and I again pointed the gun at his chest.
"Answer me question." I said through gritted teeth.  He shook his head and I could see him trying to hold back the screams of pain.  I dug the toe of my tennis shoe into his injured foot and he let out a yelp of pain.
"Answer me." I said again as I pushed my foot harder.
He still refused to answer me.  And suddenly I became very aware of my surroundings.  We were still in front of the school but there was no one outside.  Everyone had ran inside as soon as they saw what was going on.  I started remembering the screams and people running for cover as this whole event was taking place.  My mind had just blocked them out while I was focusing on the man, but now that I was remembering I could see and hear it all very clearly.  There were faces pressed against every window I could see, all of them looking at me with shock and fear.  Then I noticed my best friend Kasey, he was looking out one of the door windows that were closest to me. When I saw how scared he was I dropped the gun to my side.


As soon as I did this the man started to go into action.  I quickly roundhouse kicked him in the temple and he crumpled again unconscious.  I tucked the gun into my jacket and pulled out the emergency phone that the government had issued to me when I was three.  I had never even taken it out of it's casing until that morning.  I suppose I subconsciously knew that I would need it that day.  I flipped it open called the only number in my contacts list.  
"This is agent Barlow." said the man who answered.
"My name is Amanda Dayton," I began, "I was issued this governmental phone when I was three.  Today a man tried to attack me outside of my school.  I've knocked him unconscious and need you to send someone right away."  I heard him bark some orders to someone on his end and then he returned to the phone.
"We are on our way Miss Dayton.  Is there anything else?"
I paused for a moment.
"I'm ready to begin my training." I finally said.


The line went dead and I put the phone back into my pocket.  I turned and walked towards the doors where Kasey was.  As I approached he opened the doors to meet me.  He still looked scared, he seemed too timid to actually walk up to me so I covered the distance between us so he wouldn't have to.  I didn't know what to say so I just stood there silent, searching his face for something, anything.


"You're leaving, aren't you?" he asked.  Although it didn't seem like a real question; because out of everyone I had known throughout my life, he was the only one outside of my family that I had told about myself.


"Kasey," I began one afternoon as we were out in my backyard climbing a tree.  We were 9 at the time and I was up at the very top of the tree where I always climbed to be alone.  I had been an expert at climbing anything from trees, walls, and mountain cliffs since the age of 7.  I looked down at Kasey who was approximately ten feet below me to see if he'd heard me.  It didn't seem as if he had, so I swiftly jumped from branch to branch down to where he was.


"How do you do that?" he complained as I hung by my knees on the small branch directly above him.  He'd been trying to get to my high spot in the tree for months now but he kept getting stuck around the same spot every time, which happened to be the spot where he was now.  It was the tricky spot in the tree where suddenly all the branches were out of reach.  What you had to do was jump up to grasp the branch where I was hanging and then you had to swing yourself out to a lower hanging limb a couple feet away.  I'd shown him this trick many times before but he refused to try it.  Instead he opted to attempt the Winnie the Pooh shimmy up the main trunk of the tree, which resulted in bruised buttock failure every time.


I watched as he tried this method again.  By wrapping his arms and legs around the trunk he slowly shimmied his way up inch by little inch.  He got so close that time, but as soon as he reached out to grab the branch he slid back down smacking his rear end on the lower branch.  He winced and began rubbing his left butt cheek where he landed on a particularly painful notch in the wood.


I went on, "Kasey I have to tell you something."  My tone was grave and serious and he seemed to pick up on it.  He moved over on the lower branch giving me room to join him.  I flipped right side up and dropped beside him landing softly on my toes.  Standing I looked down at his awe struck face.  I smiled and then sat down beside him.  "I'm not sure how to explain this."  I started, looking at him for reassurance.  He nodded for me to continue, so I did.


"I'm not a normal kid.  I was born with my life already planned out for me.  I have a destiny that people have been expecting me to fulfill since birth.  I'm supposed to become a governmental agent and help save the world."  I glanced at my best friend again to gage his reaction.  He was sitting in stunned silence, this was obviously not what he was expecting, so I continued on.  "My body is capable of things that even I don't understand.  I am unusually strong for my size, I don't seem to feel pain in the extreme way that other people do, and I..." I stumbled over the last bit, not entirely sure how to explain what I wanted to tell him.  "I can make fire..." I ended quite lamely.


I looked over at him waiting for a response.  His face changed from confusion to disbelief mixed with a tinge of anger.  "You're lying!" he grumbled very childishly.  At first I became angry at his response, until I realized that we were on 9 and we were technically still children.  I had always been mature for my age and sometimes found it hard to associate with my immature age group.


"Kasey I'm not lying to you, I promise!" 
"Yes you are.  I'm not dumb you know!"
"I don't think you are dumb!"
"Then prove it!" he said folding his arms with a smugness that just oozed childish confidence.
"Fine!" I was fed up, and I was prepared to prove him wrong and wipe that smug smile off of his face.  I held out my hand palm up concentrating on the particles of air above my outstretched hand.  I felt the heat travel from the center of my chest, to my shoulder, down my arm and into my palm.  I glanced over at Kasey to make sure he was paying attention and then I ignited the air particles.  I created a burning flame a couple inches above my outstretched hand that was slightly bigger than I meant it to be.  I was still learning to control this fire, and had had a couple accidents with it recently.


Shocked and scared Kasey gasped and attempted to scoot away from me forgetting that we were high up in a tree.  I extinguished my flame as he began to fall backwards towards the ground.  I immediately went into action, dropping from branch to branch chasing after my best friends falling form.  A couple of feet above the ground I managed to grab onto Kasey's wrist with my right hand while simultaneously clutching onto a branch with my other and wrapping my legs around the trunk to keep me sturdy.  After stopping his fall I gently dropped him the next two feet to the grassy ground below.  He landed on his feet but stumbled a bit and then fell back onto his butt.  I dropped down to his side and helped him up.


"Wow, you just saved my life.  Thank you!"  He said in the most sincere voice I had ever heard escape his lips.
"Do you believe me now?" I asked, still a little upset that he had challenged me in the first place. He nodded and we walked inside, got an otter pop for each of us, and we never talked about it ever again.


Now standing there in front of him remember that moment and watching him wait for my answer I became very sad.


"Yes, I am." I nodded, trying to hold back tears.  The tears that were pressing against the backs of my eyes weren't just a result of leaving behind a good friend, I was also terrified of what was going to happen to me.  For the first time in my life I let myself think about what my life would hold.  With a wave of fear I reached out to my best friend and hugged him tightly, worried that I would never see him again.  He hugged back and we separated knowing that this was it.  I turned and walked back to the unconscious man as a half dozen sleek black cars sped into the parking lot.


Four men stepped out of the third car; two removed a collapsable gurney from the back seat and rushed to the unconscious man to my left, and the other two came straight to me.
"Agent Barlow." the taller of the two introduced himself while reaching out a hand for me to shake.  "And this is Agent Wilkes."  I shook the hand of the other man noticing his softer features and kind eyes.  "He will be your mentor from now on."


I nodded knowing that they wanted some kind of a response but not sure of what to say in the situation.  With that they ushered me to the car they got out of as the other men took the man I knocked unconscious to the car behind ours.


Ever since then my life has been anything but normal.  Since then my life has been nothing but school, training, and missions.  I miraculously convinced the CIA to let me continue my schooling in a normal setting.  I finished elementary at Windridge with Kasey and then we went on to Farmington Jr. High.  Everyday after school from 10 until the age of 14 I would get picked up by Agent Wilkes, who told me I could call him Dennis if I wanted to but mostly I just call him Wilkes, then we would drive a couple minutes to the underground bunker that was built for the purpose of training me.  And then we would train.  Under Wilkes guidance I have become a master swordsman, master archer, I've become skilled in taekwondo, kung fu, sarit sarak, S.C.A.R.S., ninjutsu, jogo do pau, and shin-kicking (which is real, look it up if you don't believe me!)  I've even learned to control my fire and I've learned how to used it while fighting.


On June 24, during the summer before I started High School I had my first real mission.  I'd rather not relive the gruesome details so all that I am going to say is that I lost a man.  After we apprehended the enemy I began to run.  I didn't know where I was going, or why, I simply needed to run.  So I ran.  It was about 45 minutes before Wilkes found me.  He jumped out of his car ready to talk me through whatever emotional crisis I was going through, but that didn't register to me.  Unfortunately he didn't understand what was going through my head.


I was turning 15 in a couple days.  I was supposed to be hanging out with friends, getting myself ready for the drama fest of public high school, thinking about boys.  Not watching people I know and care about get killed because of a crucial mistake.  I felt jaded and I lashed out at Wilkes.  I was prepared to kill him.  I saw him as the root of all my problems, all the things that were wrong with my life.  As I jumped up to attack him he knew exactly what I was about to do.  I should've realized that since he had taught me that particular form that he would see it right away.  He caught my ankle in mid air as it was heading towards his face and he twisted it with a sickening crack.  


I knew instantly that it was broken.  I didn't need to feel the pain to know that.  I could clearly see it, and I definitely heard it as well.  The knowledge that my ankle was broken seemed to bring me back to my senses.  I looked up at Wilkes and tears began streaming down my face.  It was the first time I had cried since that very first car ride we took to my parents house to explain to them that I was finally starting to fulfill my destiny.  I cried for all the long days I had endured training, for all the things I'd missed out on that normal kids have, and mostly I cried for Agent Coulson who will forever be with me.


Wilkes took me back the the base where I was put under as they performed surgery.  Wilkes apparently got a stern talking to for injuring me, and was almost fired.  Luckily I had a say in it and told Agent Barlow that if I didn't train with Wilkes then I didn't train at all.  The broken bones took me out for the rest of that summer and a little into my first year of High School.  I broke both the tibia and fibula so it needed a long time to heal.  I was three months before I could start walking again and another month before I could resume my training.


Since then I've had many different missions, and I've received countless injuries.  I've lost teeth and have had to get fake ones as a result, I've gotten multiple bruises and cuts, I've burned myself many a times when trying to fire bend, and I've even received a minor gun wound on my left wrist.  But none of my battle wounds can compare to the very impressive scar on my right leg from when Wilkes broke my ankle.


Now I am 20 years old, I have a specialized team that is under my command, and I am more deadly than anyone else on Earth (I am also single, just in case anyone was wondering.)  I can feel my destiny looming ever closer each year, and I know that someday I will face a greater enemy than ever before and I will have to save the world from utter destruction.  


And that is the true life story of me.